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real life. real organized. real simple.™ |
 DIVA SUPERMODEL AMANDA
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P.O. Box 333 Georgetown, KY 40324 p : 859-321-4759 e : getneat@realneat.com
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[ real neat ] self-reflection
As I sit here, alone in my apartment, I wonder why I chose to focus on the merging of two households for this month's newsletter... the irony!
Anyway, the act of creating one unified home out of two separate houses can be a great challenge, especially for more seasoned individuals. So, along with plenty of tips and ideas for making this transition easier, I have included some handy checklists to help you focus on what is most important in this time of upheaval : your loved ones.
Best of luck to you!
MICHELLE DEO
Professional Organizer
P.S. Looking for advice? Need a referee? I can help! Contact me today to schedule your free consultation.
 [ real neat ] merge : combining two households
First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes... some serious discussion about whether or not his black leather college Lazy-Boy gets to become a part of her shabby chic décor.
We all know good relationships thrive on compromise, but this is never more apparent than when two people move 3,000 square feet worth of stuff into one 1,500 square foot home.
How to decide what stays and what goes?
Some of it will be obvious (i.e., you don't need 2 toaster ovens).
Some of it will be consequential (i.e., if you are moving in together because you got married, you won't need to decide whose bed linens to keep because you probably got new ones from your registry, so you'll both get rid of your old blankies).
Most of it will be about negotiation (i.e., you both love to read, but only so many books can fit on a bookshelf).
Pose this question to each other and answer honestly:
Which books will you re-read, and which books are you keeping just so you can say, "I've read that" or "I've studied that. I have knowledge. I am educated."?
He says:
Honey, it's fiction and you already know how it ends, and you don't re-read books... why keep it?
She says:
Babe, you are an accountant. Why do you need those huge old college Marine Biology textbooks?
There's got to be a give and take. Remember... you signed up "for better or for worse"... and in this case, "for worse" might mean she really wants her Precious Moments collection prominently displayed.
Talk it out. Listen to your partner. Choose your battles. If you lose your battle, build a bridge... and get over it. It's just stuff—don't I say that enough? When all else fails, hire an impartial third party professional organizer to come in and help make decisions.
Short on space? Purge, baby, purge!!!
One of my maintenance clients has a live-in boyfriend who started out by asking me to make room for him in just one drawer. From there, his clothing has slowly crept into her already-bulging closet. To accommodate him (and make him want to sleep there 5 days a week as she would like), she has had to ask some uncomfortable questions like, "Do I love my boyfriend more than I love my wardrobe and my Louboutin collection?"
* tough one *
To help her in her decision-making process, I argued that if she was willing to make room in her heart for him, she should be willing to make room in her closet! Letting him make his way into her closet has really been a metaphor for him making his way into her life. Sometimes you have to let go of old items that are holding you in the past to make room for new (wonderful) things to come in. To her credit, she has purged quite a bit in the last few sessions and has significantly slowed down on the shopping (resulting in fewer new things in the closet). I guess retail therapy isn't necessary when you're in love!
Ladies, if you decide you want to have your cake and eat it to (i.e., have your man and keep your closet full of shoes too), consider buying a hanging rack for his clothing. Get a canvas cover for it to keep it discreet.
As Tim Gunn says, "Make it work!"
If you've done a good job of purging, but the house isn't coming together because you don't have similar design styles, don't get too hung up on trying to create one "look" for your home. I'm a big fan of eclectic d´cor (i.e., I don't love the matchy-matchy thing), so I think merging two distinctly different styles, while challenging, CAN work.
In the end, the result of a unified, happy home front is far better than the sum of its (possibly unstylish) parts. Let the stuff take a backseat to the excitement of living and being together.
~ Guest Author : Heather Lambie ~
[ real neat ] handy checklists
[ real neat ] organizing joke
Bob moved in with his girlfriend and her enormous collection of old magazines. They took up an entire room in the apartment. "It's me or the magazines," Bob insisted. When she refused to part with any of them, Bob left. Like he told his friends... she just had too many issues.
[ real neat ] blog highlights
Last month, 5 new organizing tips & ideas were added to
my blog.
Some of the most popular entries were...
Don't forget to e-mail me questions about your toughest organizing dilemmas, or your favorite organizing tips. If I feature an answer to your question, or your tip on my blog, you could win some real neat organizing goodies!
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* * * * * household merger special * * * * *
Getting married? Attending a wedding? Celebrating an anniversary?
Bless the happy couple with the gift of organization on this joyous occasion!
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